sej and jay's end of summer reflection
a cute little Q&A with ur fav BEAUTIFUL BIG TIDDIE BBL BLOGGERS <3
.・゜゜・・゜゜・．.・゜゜・・゜゜・
Hello friends from sej and jay <3
Before we begin, we would like to take the time to thank all of our LOVELY paid and unpaid subscribers for all the love and support during our first couple of months here at NORTH OF SPACE.
This little galaxy in the north corner of the interweb has been such a blessing to exist in and we are so grateful for all of our visitors who continue to tune in no matter how depressing, complex, or personal our writing can get. It has always been a dream of ours to be a part of a collective where we can share our writing on full blast. The experience so far has been extremely fulfilling and has helped us become more confident as writers and creatives.
Thank you all so much for supporting our endeavors and allowing us to exist here in NORTH OF SPACE. The growth displayed in both of us over the past couple of months would not have been possible without this blog and our supporters <3
We are sending our love to you all from NORTH OF SPACE and congratulating you all for making it through the summer. To wrap up this first chapter of our blog, we decided it was necessary to reflect on this past season of our lives.
Please enjoy the following Q&A where we asked each other some fun questions that helped us understand what summer really meant to us.
Q for S: A movie that reminds you of summer?
Q for J: What are the little things you’ve noticed that you love about summer?
A: So strange but I love the smell of the hot AC blasting through my car, the way the sun hits the leaves in a very specific way– almost like it’s casting a light against a sheet of a puppet show except everything is green and veiny and alive, and also maybe how music just sounds so different during the summer and how I can see the bonds form between my conscious and the sounds I hear during the summer that I will reminisce about in the future seasons when it’s too cold and I can’t imagine what it feels like to thaw.
Q for S: Would present day you recognize who you were at the beginning of summer?
A: Ummm maybe? Because like nothing went as expected of course but I dealt with it in a way that I could, only because I reminded myself at the beginning to expect the unexpected and chill out.
Q for J: Something new you learned this summer:
A: I learned that nothing in the world belongs to me but my love, mine, all mine… (SORRY I KNOW I REFERENCE THIS EVERY DAY IT’S JUST SO GOOD YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND… expect a song analysis from me about this song soon <3)
Q for S: Write an acrostic poem for the word ‘summer’:
A: (sej read the question wrong and thought she was supposed to choose her own word and decided on ‘socratic’ LOL she’s so silly and we love her so we kept both of her responses and her comment too)
Some feelings drifted
Over a
Cut throat idea of
Revolution
Against a cyclical, sweet
Tangerine of a home
Isolated in a necessary
Corruption of expectation
OH HAHA I didn’t see the word summer I just thought I can pick a word hehe
Seasonal
Upbringing of untamed energy
Mutilated by expectation
Managed by indifference
Everything kindly
Remains in ancient ruins
Q for J: What is one thing the summer sun made you realize? About yourself or otherwise?
A: I LOVE MY BROWN SKIN AND IT’S OK TO GET DARKER IN THE SUMMER AND MAYBE I’M ACTUALLY NOT A HORRIBLE PERSON WITH NO FUTURE AND NO FRIENDS— MY ASS JUST NEEDS TO GO OUTSIDE AND SIT IN THE SUMMER SUN AND BE REMINDED THAT I’M AWESOME AND SEXY AND THAT THE WORLD WE LIVE IN IS TRULY BEAUTIFUL, FUCK!!!
Q for S: June 21st was the first day of summer but when did summer actually start for you?
A: I think summer started for me before then ofc, because I was in Phoenix and I remember a really sweet pool day with my friends and it was not going as planned because we got high and then went to the pool only to find out it was closed, so we had to improvise and had a really good time eating snacks in a pool from a older neighborhood and we floated and ate hot cheetos and fuck a European summer when I can have that sweet mess :)
Q for J: What do you imagine your summer to look like in 25 years? (Minus climate change) and what part of this summer reflects that?
A: My summer mainly consisted of wine nights and trash talking sessions in between pool tables at dive bars with sticky floors. Summer 2058 and I’m almost 60 and I’m probably drunk in a bar with my friends and we’re talking shit about our ex husbands and making bets on whose grandchild is more likely to become famous and buy their grandmother a multi-million dollar home in the countryside of their beloved foreign land. It’s only 3 in the afternoon and we’re laughing too loud and the younger folks are giving us weird looks— either judging us or hoping to be just like us when they age.
Q for S: Is it really summer if you don’t cry at least 4-5 times a week and reminisce about your favorite summer when nothing was real and everything around you felt so alive?
A: Ummm I’ve been trying to cry and I can’t and yesterday watching the sunset by myself at the beach in Tarragona, Spain I shed a little tear because I couldn’t believe I was there alone and felt really looked after by everything.
Q for J: Seasonally, what is summer intended for for you? Did you follow this intention?
A: Summer has always been intended to rest and recharge like some type of mental hibernation. I think this mindset stems from the two month long summer vacations you get for the first 18 years of your life. That type of repetition really buries itself deep and it’s hard to become unfamiliar with. I’ve realized that the life I live does not allow me to rest and recharge for as long as I’d like, but I’m learning that these moments I crave of such a treatment should be obtained at any given moment needed. There was enough resting for me this summer, to say the least. The way I can tell is because I feel more present and less sad and we love that for me, truly.
Q for S: What does a perfect summer day look like to you?
A: Beach, laughs, dogs, old people, water, fruit and the perfect song. Typical idgaf. And maybe live music in a chatty restaurant.
Q for J: Your favorite morning this summer?
A: Waking up in the early morning to a massive thunderstorm— house shaking, roof rattling, trees bending, streets flooding… only for me to go back to bed and wake up an hour later to blue skies and not a single trace of this mysterious storm. Felt like I entered a new era that morning, like the storm had cleared something from me that I could not let go of.
Q for S: You’ve written the movie of the summer…what is the plot, who are you casting, and what is the song playing in the opening scene?
A: It would be like Amélie because manic pixie dream girl and she just be vibing with herself and people are constantly looking to her to feel special, and I would cast Jennifer Lawrence because 7th grade me would love that and I feel free and myself like I did in middle school with like no fucks and kinder and collecting people, and the opening scene song would be Seaforth by King Krule
Q for J: What did you hate but understand had to be this summer?
A: Hate that I had to slave my life away like a dog but I understand that was necessary because it added structure to my life, gave me some type of purpose, and taught me a lot about how to be grateful. I don’t mean this in a pro-capitalism way but idk. The FOMO was bad this summer and I spent a lot of time comparing my life to how my friends were enjoying theirs and once I made peace with my situation and circumstances I had this deep understanding that my purpose this summer was to truly dissolve in my blessings in order to make room for more <3
Q for S: Summer smells like…
A: The hardworking Kebab guys and clean thin sheets and my Baccarat Rouge dupe
Q for J: (sej throwing back the same movie question jay asked her two questions ago…) You’ve written the movie of the summer… blah blah blah—
A: It’s a coming of age movie except everyone is in their twenties because twenty-somethings are still ‘coming of age’ and everyone at any age should be depicted in film realistically— which is that at all times we are all ‘coming of age', and it takes place in Phoenix and it’s a reflection of the passionate generation the fuels Phoenix’s art scene and the jobs they have to work to fund their creative dreams. There are late night driving scenes, bar hopping scenes, music shows in sketchy areas with many underaged kids scenes, many scenes of people slaving away as food service workers, retail workers, bank tellers, educators, health care workers, and literally any job you can think of that’s physically and mentally demanding and underpaid, a lake trip gone wrong scene, a summer fling gone wrong scene, scenes of intense and depressing early morning spiraling, fighting with your family scenes, scenes of people displaying really unhealthy financial skills, reminiscing about the past and hopelessly debating the future with your friends while parked in a car scene, multiple realistic scenes of people meeting rejection with their creative dreams only for better opportunities to present themselves in the end, a lot of media consumption, music listening, passionate kissing, regretfully yelling, forever yearning. I have a cameo but idk who I would cast as myself but I do want Obama to play my dad (don’t ask, this just feels like the right director choice). And for the song playing in the opening scene: Calfskin Smack by Cocteau Twins <3
summer from North of Space — a playlist of songs we had on repeat all summer long ❤️
And now a poem to conclude the ending of summer:
Late Summer by Anna Kamienska
I’ll lock myself now
in a cell of prickly hay
to think through all from the beginning
A leaf a root an ant a hare
the sea a cloud a rock
I’ll think about them
as a sinner thinks
about his sins
I’ll ask myself
whether I regret very much
not belonging to a land of green
I’ll question how many times
I didn’t ask roots which way to go
I’ll repent before water a cloud
a birch-tree
I’ll wash their feet
and dress their wounds
Why can’t I be reconciled
to green rustling life
and sleep among mortal dreams
Leaf
teach me to fall
on the indifferent earth
THANK U ALL 4 UR LOVE & SUPPORT <3
SEE U IN OUR NEXT CHAPTER ‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾
☆ s + j from north of space